I’m really proud of myself because it’s the first time I’ve written creatively since November with NaNoWriMo [LINK], and it’s the first time in about 9 months in which I’ve written something that I actually want to go back to and edit and revise and submit.

Below is an excerpt for the screenplay, the screenplay of NO NAME. LOL It will have a title some day, but the one I originally had, Hell’s Angel, doesn’t really fit the story or character any more.

Remember, this is a VERY ROUGH, haven’t looked at it at ALL draft of the script. LOL Judge accordingly if you must judge.

Here’s a quick synopsis of story: A woman returns to her life after a 10-year bid for killing her husband with one thing on her mind: reuniting with the daughter who hates her.

INT. COFFEE SHOP – MORNING

Peighton, dressed up, is sitting at a small table in the corner, typing on a laptop.

She looks deep in thought.

DETECTIVE DEEKS

Good morning, Peighton.

Peighton looks up and is none too thrilled to see Detective Deeks before her.

DETECTIVE DEEKS (CONT’D)

You look nice.

Peighton doesn’t respond.

DETECTIVE DEEKS (CONT’D)

See you’re fitting into the world quickly.

Detective Deeks points at the laptop.

PEIGHTON

I used computers in prison…while I was getting my degree, Detective.

Detective Deeks looks outside the large windows and spots a motorcycle in a parking spot. He points toward it.

DETECTIVE DEEKS

Is that your cycle out there?

Peighton nods.

DETECTIVE DEEKS (CONT’D)

And you rode it here? Dressed like that?

Peighton looks up to him and nods.

There is a pause.

DETECTIVE DEEKS (CONT’D)

(clears throat) You mind if I sit here?

Peighton shrugs.

PEIGHTON

If you must.

Detective Deeks sits, stares at Peighton.

DETECTIVE DEEKS

I’ve done some research on you…

Peighton snaps her attention toward him. She’s angry.

PEIGHTON

What the hell for? I haven’t done shi…

Detective Deeks lifts his hands.

DETECTIVE DEEKS

I know you haven’t. I don’t suspect you of anything.

(softer) This is about your past. About what happened to you.

PEIGHTON

And why is that any concern of yours?

DETECTIVE DEEKS

Because my son is seeing your daughter, and I want to know everything about her. And that includes you.

Peighton returns her gaze to the laptop.

DETECTIVE DEEKS (CONT’D)

And I’m sorry.

Peighton eyes Detective Deeks.

PEIGHTON

For what?

DETECTIVE DEEKS

For seeing you just as a murderer when I didn’t know all the facts.

PEIGHTON

(shrugs) Doesn’t matter. Most of the world goes off indicting people without knowing all the facts. Why should you be any different?

DETECTIVE DEEKS

Because I work to be different. And I think you’re a good person.

PEIGHTON

And you tell me this, why?

DETECTIVE DEEKS

Because I don’t want you to get hurt.

PEIGHTON

By what?

Detective Deeks sighs.

Peighton shakes her head and points in his direction.

PEIGHTON (CONT’D)

Don’t even go there.

DETECTIVE DEEKS

I know things. Things you don’t.

Peighton closes her laptop and places it in her bag. She drops money on the table and stands.

She bends to Detective Deeks’ ear.

PEIGHTON

You just can’t believe people can change, can you?

Detective Deeks turns to face Peighton. Their faces are close. There is a pause as they stare at one another.

DETECTIVE DEEKS

I believe people can change. I don’t believe the people you hang out with have changed.

Peighton stands and takes a step back.

PEIGHTON

Well, they haven’t done nothing to prove me wrong yet.

Detective Deeks raises an eyebrow.

DETECTIVE DEEKS

Really? Nothing?

Peighton looks away.

DETECTIVE DEEKS (CONT’D)
Just protect yourself. If things start to feel funny, protect yourself and get out of the way of danger.

Peighton gives him a parting glance. Nods.

PEIGHTON

Heard you. OK.

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Take the time to check them out!

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Something I read last night made me think about the Writers Boot Camp course I offer online.

McKee states, “Of the total creative effort represented in a finished work, 75 percent or more of a writer’s labor goes into designing a story.  Who are these characters?  What do they want?  Why do they want it?  How do they go about getting it?  What stops them?  What are the consequences?  Finding the answers to these grand questions and shaping them into story is our overwhelming creative task.

“Designing story tests the maturity and insight of the writer, his knowledge of society, nature, and the human heart.  Story demands both vivid imagination and powerful analytic thought.”

Those questions that McKee states are paramount to my WBC class.  They are important to the development of a strong story, of a story with a developed character, a solid situation, and a plot that moves toward a satisfying, “real” ending.

I, like McKee, care about the STORY, and if you’re a real writer, someone who’s doing this for the love of writing and with the desire to better your craft, then you will care about the STORY, too.

And speaking of story, I wrote ten pages to my screenplay, Saying No to the Big O.  Current page count:  44.

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My name and title are on their [page].

The WINNING 10 SCRIPTS WILL BE ANNOUNCED – November 12th – then those scripts will be read at WILDsound’s November Screenplay event. The WINNING SCRIPT out of that round (voted ONLINE) will then have their script made into a movie.

I’m very excited.  In the last year and a half, I’ve written three scripts; the very first one made it to the quarterfinal round of a competition – the pilot for RUNNING FROM MISS RIGHT, a six-episode mini series I wrote.

I haven’t submitted the second script anywhere yet, but I plan to SOON.  My third – BURDENS – is now a finalist.  My latest short script received some great comments by a screenwriter who taught a Writing the Short Screenplay workshop that I participated in recently.

I’m thinking I might be finding my calling in this crazy writing journey, LOL

Wish me luck!

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